What if the biological parent is not a feature in the children’s lives but your new partner is? Sometimes after a divorce the other parent disappears and is not there to make the important decisions and a new partner is the ‘Dad’ in the children’s lives. Or the biological parent may have previously passed away. Is it possible for a step-parent to adopt children in The Netherlands, so they also have legal status as a parent? The short answer is yes: adoption by a step-parent is possible!
Applying for adoption via the courts
Adoption can only be achieved via a court procedure. The step-parent can only file a request after they have been living together with the other parent for three or more years at the moment of filing the request. Please note that the ‘step’-parent does not need to be married to the biological parent.
Additionally, the adoption must be in the best interest of the child.
Other formal requirements are:
- The adoptive parent must be 18 or older;
- The child must still be a minor on the date of the request;
- If the mother is a minor, she needs to be at least 16 years of age;
- The biological parents must both agree or at least not object to the request;
- The step-parent needs to have been taking care of the child for at least a year together with the parent as a family unit;
- The parent the step-parent is living with or married to must have sole custody of the child.
If the absent parent has custody, the request cannot be filed until that custody has been terminated (see below). If the other parent has neglected the well-being of the child in the past, has barely had a relationship or not lived with the child, or has committed certain crimes against the child, then under certain circumstances, the court may pass over any objection to the adoption raised by the parent.
How does the court procedure for adoption work?
If the parents still have joint custody, the starting point is a court procedure filed by the parent to end custody, combined with a request for adoption by the step-parent once custody has been legally terminated. The Dutch courts allow both requests to be combined in one procedure. A lawyer is mandatory for this procedure.
The petitioner must provide all available information about the person and whereabouts of the absent parent. This parent will be invited by the court to take part in the proceedings to make their views clear. If it is clear the parent is aware of the procedure, but does not respond to this request, the courts generally assume the absent parent does not object to the request.
If the child is over 12 years old, the court will invite the child to give their views. Any objection the child may have is taken into account.
The court always examines whether the adoption is in the child’s best interests. If there is evidence that the absent parent has been deliberately kept away from the children for no good reason, then this could lead to the request being refused.
What about legal guardianship/ custody?
In many countries custody and guardianship are separate legal issues. In the Netherlands, there is no separate legal guardianship. Custody, known in Dutch as ‘gezag’, includes guardianship.
When you adopt a child, this does not mean you automatically gain legal custody of the child and can thus make legally binding decisions for the child with the parent. For this, you need to file a separate request granting joint custody which, again, can be combined with the adoption proceedings. The court will weigh if granting joint custody to the adoptive parent is in the best interests of the child. Custody can become an issue in case of a later divorce, so we advise taking this into consideration at the time of adoption.
It is even possible for a step-parent to gain custody without adopting if the parent has sole custody.
Taking the step-parent’s name
A request can be made to change the last name of the child to that of the parent or step-parent. This request will be denied if:
- The child of 12 years or older has not given their permission for the name change during the proceedings;
- The request for joint custody of the parent and step-parent has been denied;
- The request is not deemed in the best interest of the child.
What are the legal consequences of adopting as a step-parent?
The following legal consequences are attached to adoption:
- The child becomes legal heir of the adoptive parent;
- The adoptive parent gains parental rights to contact with the child;
- Rights to information about the child’s life and well-being;
- The obligation to pay child support.
Adoption therefore comes with multiple rights but also obligations.
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If you have any questions regarding the step-parent adoption or custody process, please feel free to contact us:
